Winston's journal entry

Here is a journal entry from Winston Smith, dating from January 16, 1985:

"January 16, 1985:

I love the Party; I love Big Brother… or do I? After what happened to me at the Ministry of Love by O’Brien, I’ve been devoted to the survival of the Party.  I’ve even lost my love for Julia; whenever I meet her at the Ministry of Truth, I feel no affection or desire whatsoever as I see her face, and I know that she feels the same way. To be honest, I hate the sight of her, because her Anti-Sex League sash is just a taunt to our brief relationship. I am aware of her scowling at me during the cafeteria lunches, and all I desire is to strangle that pretty neck of hers.

I visited the Community Centre yesterday. We went on a Community hike, a small trail outside London. The hike took the majority of my free time, mainly because our group went around the long trail back to the Community Centre. Julia was among the leaders, and I could tell she despised the sight of me in the group, and she sent the group around the long trail back simply to fatigue me, which didn’t help the ulcer on my legs. The hike took the majority of my free time, and by the time I was in my apartment, I drank one bottle of Victory Gin and smoked one Victory Cigarette, and went promptly to bed- naked of course, to save my clothing coupons.

Just today, which was the usual workday where I was changing the production facts of the Party (Apparently, 2000 more tons of bread was produced than the estimate, which I changed to 50,000) I met O’Brien at the Ministry of Truth. There were no dialogues exchanged, just a flicker of his eyes that sent my mind panicking. What did he mean by that? Was that a signal that I would be arrested again? Sent back to the “Place with no darkness”? Will I become an Unperson, who is erased from history that no one remembers?

The Ministry of Love has changed me, but when will the Thought Police come for me again? O’Brien has made me aware of the fact that I am directly under their control. They have changed me to be devoted to the Party, but I know that once they catch a thoughtcriminal, they keep them on surveillance for the rest of their lives, if they don’t catch them again: sooner or later, they’ll arrest me again for charges I didn’t commit, and possibly execute me. Somehow, they’ve got me even more devoted to the Party than by simply torturing me- I know that the Party can execute me anytime they decide if necessary, and thus my life is in their hands, not mine own.   

DOWN WITH BIG BROTHER

I have chosen to write this journal entry to describe the end of the story of Winston, the primary character in the novel, without whom there would be no story. Winston, after being released back into society, reintegrates himself into the Party and momentarily stops his "Crimethink". Deep, deep inside, however, Winston knows he still hates the Party and Big Brother, and knows that the Party will come for him sooner or later. In the end of the novel, Winston realizes that although he has been arrested and tortured into loving Big Brother again, the Party (Not wanting to create martyrs by executing them right away) has released him and reintegrated to the society of Oceania. However, some time later, the Party will accuse him on several false charges and finally execute him, thereby preventing any "heroic deaths".

As Winston has written in the last portion of the journal entry, the Party was able to control Winston more effectively than simply torturing him. By allowing Winston to realize that the Party can wipe him from all traces of history simply if necessary, Winston's life is in their hands, not his own. Also, by keeping the date of his rearrest/execution a mystery, he doesn't know when the Thought Police will arrest him; he might be executed at any time, or even never, but they don't need to tell him that. As a result, it keeps Winston constantly devoted to the Party, never knowing when he'll be erased by the Party, but knowing for sure that someday they will. I believe that by writing about the future of the story, it would provide more insight to the psychological manipulation and power that the Party dominates on their citizens.